After 8 or 9 years , This day i feel Healthy
A bad neck ,back head pain (Cervio chronique ) transferred my life to a piece of Hell , that ill which is not dangerous but too painful.
He occupied every second of my daily life ,in the mornings, it starts , I start to motivate myself every morning that i should resist because i do know that life will not wait until i became that healthy man.
That ill continue attacking me the whole day, before sleeping ,after sleeping , in the moment of reading ,,eating, when standing ,when laughing ,when talking , when , when ....
it becames a part of my life ,
If you will ask me what the feeling you feel when you're talking to people , i would say : a pain
That pain during my studies transferred me to a weak person, a non motivated one , a less confident person
You have to imagine how i was before, I was that child full of energy and motivation
During my studies, I suffer a lot , i do use lots of Technics to adapt myself with that pain.
1- when the pain became too hard , sleep , but that solution sometimes became a controversy solution , it makes pain worse
2-Using Hot water, it worked sometimes , but in the bad pain periods, it became a bad solution
3-Run : I do run a summer every night, but things became worst because of that , that pain have no rules
4-Swimming : damn it, doctors solutions, swimming for a month ,Sun wasn't at rincon those days
5-Back fixer, it fix your back and let your back resist , but after a hard day of using it , it became a terrible pain
6-Kinésithérapie: 15 seances, it only makes me good the day, after that , Nothing to see
You can't imagine how it was harmful for me, When i saw young people like me, moving their hands and necks in a flexible way. that makes me so sad !
when i saw little children in my family , with that strongness , i felt crasy
When i tried to minuties task like khyata, that pain became a monster
I Visited lots of specialist , I have to wait a lot to meet a doctor to tell me that i'm suffering from A hard rebel muscular contractures , Others gave some asperin and lets go
you cannot imagine how i talked with myself about this ill, I tried to convince her that i can survive with it , rememebring her by the stephen Howking case, she didn't believe me, when pain is increased , she did not accept from any convictions , in those cases , i stopped doing anything , stopping thinking ,stopping everything
I don't know how i can handle that amount of Health and strongness i feel actually , that feeling is unexpressed , that feeling of no pain get me back to days of my childhood
I feel a inner comfort in my heart, he stopped bombing fast , He's now full ,yes full ,it's the feeling of fullness
I'm scared also from this new feeling , i'm not used to it , it's like when seeing for the first time
and i really i don't know why people get anxious and angry while they 're healthy,
That day that i will celebrate it someday will be missed by a single person who loves me without conditions and she saw over years and years how weak i was ,
Thank you Ma
I would hardly thanks myself for the first time because it survived
Also , i would like to thank all people and doctors.
